This weekend is NYC Pride. Pretty exciting-eh? In light of the many many drunken women I will meet, the many many drunken exes I will surely encounter (Curly included) and the many many drunken friends I will take care of, I have decided to make a short list of the most important survival skills for Pride:
1) In case you spot your ex, make sure you are surrounded by your most beautiful friends. If your ex was your most beautiful friend, surround yourself with ugly people so you can look the hottest possible.
2) When a friend decides to make out with you and you don't want to, quickly shout "Tequila shots!" Tequila and lesbians go hand in hand.
3) When a friend decides to make with you and want to, don't even think about this post, just do it.
4) While at the Pride parade, do not, even though it seems cute and funny to joke about, take free condoms from people passing them out. It's awkward and confusing for those of us lesbians that don't know what condoms are.
5) And most importantly, do not try and crash a gay male party. Stick to the lesbians- because isn't the entire point of pride to "bond" with other women...a.k.a. get as many phone numbers and meet as many hot strangers as possible?
Until the drama continues...
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